To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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