You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
No more Irish car bombs ever.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
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What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
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"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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