69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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