shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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