So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
