Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
