how can u be prego again
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize