I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
