But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
