no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Randomize