is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
