HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
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