Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
