Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I can text with my tongue
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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