Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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