All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
he shaved USA in his pubs
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
