: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
