I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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