Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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