how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize