the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
