Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I love you. Go after that dick
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
