Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Two words: nipple clamps
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