did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Randomize
