Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
