Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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