Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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