Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Randomize
