I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
