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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I will be naked everywhere
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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