just come out here and I will go home with you...
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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