so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion