one two three fourrrrnication!
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize