Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
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we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
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He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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