Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
