You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
