Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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