I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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