so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
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He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
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im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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