I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize