would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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