Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
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I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
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You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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