he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
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