check it out our google latitudes are spooning
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
These tits shall not be calmed
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
