So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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