Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Duck Duck Cougar?
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.