I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize