that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
