We're like a lot better than the average bears
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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