Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
