I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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