break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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